Terrorism within us

Terrorism.

The word itself rings with fear. You picture the grotesque killings. The innocent bloodshed. Stop! Stop that thought there.

Terrorism as defined by the Merriam-Webster Dictionary, is a noun that simply put, means:

“the use of violent acts to frighten the people in an area as a way of trying to achieve a political goal.”

But today i ask, how many different forms of terrorism exist in our lives as we speak? Im not talking about the world renowned big names. No thank you politics isn’t one of my favourites.

Im talking terrorism in our communities. In our homes. In our very own families.

You see, terrorism uses violent acts to frighten people.Violence need not be physical. Violence can be the mere act of verbal abuse, putting someone down, isolation,bullying…the list is endless!

How many of us have experienced bitter relatives?  The ones who glee with joy at your every downfall, and have a sour long face when you have the best of worlds.

The ones who couldn’t care less whether you were dead or alive, but would still turn up at your wedding to simply show of to the world – a world that anyway knows the truth!

The ones who saw you in the supermarket and walked the other way.

The ones who when you tried to say a meek hello out of respect that you were brought up with, simply ignored you.

The ones who took ‘sides’ in families and isolated you. The ones who saw you as never good enough.

Those are the real terrorists. The ones who know you and yet ignore you. The ones who silently try to harm you. The ones who go ahead and add the extra pinch of salt so that your food is a disgrace. That is a real terrorist.

One who tries to instill fear in you.

As you grow up, remember one thing. Don’t be the terrorist in your family. Don’t be the terrorist in your community.

A strong person is one who lifts you up. Who smiles when you succeed and brings out the tissue box when you don’t.

Unfortunately, that is rare to find. But it starts with you and me. It isn’t impossible.

If we start with strengthening our own homes, we end up with stronger families. This ultimately leads to stronger communities. And stronger communities that hold each other up eventually lead to stronger nations. Need i continue?

And if you choose to be the narrow minded terrorist, remember one thing – your journey here was wasted. And when you are gone, nobody will bat an eyelid over you.

Use your time on this earth wisely.

Happy Tuesday..x x

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It’s Okay To Want To Be Alone.

You stare at the girl sitting all by herself in the corner in the café. She is so comfortable with herself. Stuck in between the music playing in the background and the book she tightly clutches. She doesn’t even look up when you pass by. Infact she is so comfortable she doesn’t move an inch. It disturbs you.

You stare at the girl who gazes of into the sunset. The one who doesn’t even know she is being looked at. You see the golden rays of dusk illuminating every feature of her not-so-perfect body. You wonder what is wrong with her.

You catch her staring at the wall behind you. You turn. It’s a white wall. Not a speck on it. Not even a goddamned fly. Double-take. Her forehead crunches up, her eyes are far far away. You bring her back and ask her what she is thinking. She says nothing.  But she knows its not nothing.

And then you feel sorry for her. You wonder – maybe she is a loner.  No- Maybe she just had a rough patch with her lover. All these silly conclusions about her in your head! And then you say a mental prayer hoping you never end up like her.

Why?

Why is society so hell-bent on terming loneliness as a disease? When did wanting to be alone become so wrong? Is it because the culture we all come from isn’t used to individuality? Or is it because we are so used to being around people, that when we are alone, it just feels wrong.

Don’t get me wrong – We all need connection. Humans are biologically wired to need Love, Validation and belonging. And it’s no secret our species could never exist alone.

But it’s time we learned to embrace our individuality. Alone-ness has a great healing power. It can heal everything – from a broken heart to a broken spirit.

Don’t always be swayed into togetherness. That’s what sheep do. Not sane minded humans. It’s okay not to want to share a drink with the rest of the gang. Its okay not to want to hang out with a ton-load of people just sitting around together, because well, sitting alone is a taboo. It’s okay once in a while.

The occasional choice to be alone will nudge you into places you would never enter alone. It will make you sit on the park bench in the afternoon with nobody to talk to, not even a book to read. It will help you sip your coffee lost in the written word of another world. It will show you the myriad colors of the sunset. It will make you wonder who else is staring at the same full moon continents away.

So do away with the discomfort, and allow yourself to appreciate the being of the self once in a while. Let yourself be overcome with the power and freedom, and confidence in being yourself.

Remember, It doesn’t mean that anything is wrong with you. It doesn’t mean that anything is wrong with your life. Sometimes you just need the space to soul search. To recover. To think. To just BE. You don’t need to apologize for taking or needing this space.

It’s okay to be alone darling.

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#someonetellcnn

Kenya in the past few days has had its fair share of being in the global limelight – both good and bad.

Im not one to normally write about such topical political issues, but this one just hit a nerve.

TerrorHotbed. Is that what you called us CNN? IS that how you termed our beloved country?

And just who gave you the right to say that? What justifies your thought on another country?

Yes we have terror attacks. Yes we have insecurity. Yes we are in fear of more attacks. Yes we are a developing nation. But that dear media does not give you any right whatsoever to term us as you please.

Did you mention to the world how we have the world-famous migration in the Masai Mara? Did you mention to the world just how hard our victory to independence was? Did you mention how your citizens come as tourists for our scenic destinations? Did you mention the numerous races and cultures we still preserve in our country? Did you even mention that the Global Summit was being held in this Terror Hotbed?

No dear CNN. Because like most people out there you were too busy picking out our flaws.

Media has the freedom of speech- but why does the very same media go on and on day in day out to give us negative news? Is your mission to fill the brains out there full of terror and negativity?

Have you ever stopped to think just how your “terror hotbed” might just be a reason for a terrorist somewhere to smile? Are you fueling the fight or are you out there to help us get back our calm?

Take a moment CNN – Maybe if your reported us and the rest of the world in a positive light, you might just bring about a new revolutionary positive mind shift. Because thats what we need. We need the world to see good and do good.

As a developed nation, the most you could have done is to guide us out of this. Dont fuel this fire. Don’t send your reporters looking for “hot” topics to right about. Send them to write about our endless rivers. About our picturesque Mt Kenya. About the stylish holiday getaways that overlook crocodile infested waters. About craters and valleys. About gorges and deserts. About mud huts and thatched roofs. About out innovations. About our evolving technology. About our ability to fight back to this monster called terrorism. About the ability to stand up as a nation.

Remember – OBAMA or no Obama – Life goes on for us. Your terror hotbed might be a standstill for this weekend, but we will wake up on Monday morning and forget about your name calling. We will go to work and earn our daily bread. We will shape our economy as our kids learn one more thing this Monday morning.1

Lest you forget what humanity is about, we are trying.

Remember CNN, if our #kiderograss grew overnight – Nothing – I repeat Nothing is impossible in our country.

Give us the spotlight CNN – but for all the right reasons this time

Dear Best Friend..

I don’t get to see you everyday.

Infact, I don’t get to see you as often as I’d like.

But this isn’t about me. This is about you.

It’s about how much I miss you.

I miss you in the morning – because your chirpiness matched mine.

I missed you when I wore my best dress – because you never failed to notice. You made dressing up feel worth it, because you noticed.

I miss you when I feel like going to work in my pajamas – actually I miss all the teasing about being a total bum!

I miss you when I am out. Because places remind me of you. Because Id rather see all this with you once again then be mesmerised alone.

I miss you when I read – because though you were allergic to books, I could read to you. And you would listen to me in awe.

I miss you when I eat – Our tastebuds an absolute match!

I miss you when I cook – because experimenting new things was what we did best.

I  miss you when I sleep – Because you never failed to find some silly story for me (At the expense of having your own sleep driven away)

But most of all Best Friend,

I miss you when I’m Happy – because Happiness shared is Happiness doubled. Because only you can jump in joy 10 times IMG_8466and give me countless hugs. Because you know that happiness deserves cupcakes and cocktails, little happy notes and shopping dates. Because you spoilt me even when i Didn’t deserve it.

and I miss you when Im sad – because that’s when I need you the most. Because god dammit- you were this strength that is quite hard to find. Because you understood the sadness. And you always – I repeat ALWAYS made things better.

I miss you friend. For alot more reasons than I can write about.

I miss you for the little silly thing you are. Because its that silliness that i miss. Because only Best friends buy imaginary beach houses and Play XO on beaches under the moon.

I miss you best friend.

Alot more than you’ll ever know..

x x x

Marry a girl who Travels.Now.

You will know her when you see her. You will either love her, Or you will hate her. There is no in between here.

If you hate her, you need not read this. But if you Love her – then know that this might be the simplest kind of Love ever.

1. Marry her because it really is the simplest form of Love ever. Her expectations of you aren’t high end dinner dates or 5 star getaways. Her love will be the love of sleeping on the African Soil. It will come as backpacking the Middle East. She doesn’t even want Gucci handbags or Prada Shoes. Get her a budget ticket to anywhere on the Planet and you will be her Hero for eternity. Yes – She will put you on a pedestal and worship you! Guaranteed.

2. Marry her because she is fun. And always will be. She will crave new experiences. Both on her travels and with you. She will never be the predictable sort who bogs you down in a mundane lifestyle. She will always crave new. And the best bit – she will want to share it all with you.

3. Marry her because it isn’t her thing to doll up and attend your fancy functions. But she will try it just for you. She will goof up in her unworn stillettos, because she knows it matters to you. And after that, she will go back to her normal self. Shorts. ti-shirts. Make-up free. Because she is comfortable  – her brain is a buzz of real beauty – the kind that doesnt get washed away or wrinkled with age.

4.Marry her because she will not settle for mediocre. She knows there is too much out there to just settle for little nothings. She knows what she wants – and goes for it. She is decisive. And nothing is sexier than an independent, decisive woman.

5. And when she pitches her own tent and budgets her own trip? Marry her. Marry her because she will know how to run the household show. Because she can keep home like its her Passport. Safe and sound.

6. Marry her because she will love people. She appreciates diversity. She loves the look of fellow wanderers. She will not settle for people who bore her. She will not waste her time around those who add nothing to her perception of beauty of the world.

7. Marry her because she takes months to save up to see a fraction of the earth. And nothing could make her happier. Because she understands why she works so hard. To allow her to see the world. She makes time for it. Because she knows that work will stop for nobody. Because she knows she will not live up to infinity.

8. And that girl – she will have the best stories to put you to sleep. You will watch your children’s eyes light up with her stories. You will see them bonding for hours listening to tales about places they have never imagined existed. And you will fall in love with her again.

9. Marry her because she will never forget you. She will never go alone, because she can’t wait to share the world with you. She will throw up a tantrum until you go with her – because she knows you deserve experiences as beautiful as yourself. Because just as she can’t wait to see a new place, she can’t wait to show you off to the world. Because you embrace her passions. You fill her up. And the best she can do is fill you up in return.

10. Marry her because she knows the beauty in this world. She will be appreciative of the little notes you leave her besides her breakfast plate.She will leave your Valentines Day card on her bedside for months – until the next card arrives – because she knows you are part of her journey. A journey she will not leave unexplored.

And finally – remember – she is worth it – Because she has met so  many different people, and been to so many different places. She could have chosen anyone from her map – but she chose you. Because when she says she loves you – then there must be something special there.

Match her excitement. All she wants is someone to share this with.

Marry her.

Because that’s what a girl who loves to travel does. She loves to see the world. Preferably with you.

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Discover.A.Little.More

Looking back – the moments that I can intimately remember – are the ones where I was away from my comfort zone. When I was travelling parts of the world yet unknown by me.

I still remember the taste of the air. I still remember the saltiness of the sea. I remember the cold of the mountain snow. The colours of the tropical island birds. I remember the multicultural food palette I developed. I remember the fiery wildlife. The skies. The sunsets. The people.Travel

Yes -those are the memories that I take to my grave. Because those are the memories that matter most – to me at least.

This world has so much to offer – yet we stay cocooned in our safety zones. We fill our days with busy work schedules, and give but an hour or two to wind down before we hit the bed. Don’t get me wrong – you need to work to finance that travel!! But prioritize.

What use are the $$$ if you truly can’t enjoy the fruit of all the slogging? What will you remember on your deathbed? The hundreds of contracts you won..or the finer places that changed your perception of beauty? As a fine wise man who took me for dinner 2 nights ago said – “We save and save and then die rich.” Point made.

Choice is yours!!

Because travelling allows you to see the world as it is – to widen your self-glorified perception. It helps you discover who you are. It helps you run away from whatever it is that threatens to hold you down. It helps you connect with people on a similar level. You meet strangers. Strangers who understand you and become a part of you. You learn to be a people’s person. you learn to make friends. You learn to let go off attachments. It’s like a soul clean up really!

Because thats what travelling does- it opens up a whole new world to you.

And honestly it’s not that difficult! Later never happens. Life goes on. It will not stop for your travels. Never has – Never will.

When you are out counting your shares on the stock market – she is counting the stars in the night sky. She will always be richer. When you are showing off your new 4-wheeler, she is showing off her postcards from her latest travel. When you are busy making your life even more hectic – her mind is brewing up her next adventure. Whilst you layer up that make-up – he is adoring his sun-kissed skin.

My question is  why not now? Why? What are you waiting for? Life to happen? Because that it will. Tomorrow you will graduate and get a  job – no time you say? Then you will get married and settle in – do i hear busy again? Then comes along domestic duties..a baby or two..still busy? See those lil ones off school – university them – no money? Then finally marry them away – retire from your job – now you have all the time to see the world.But guess what? Your bones are old and brittle. You can’t climb up Everest. Your fragile skin can’t take the Caribbean heat. Suddenly – you realise your palm is very empty. And you realise how long you waited.

Don’t let anyone stop you. Your deathbed doesn’t have place for regrets of another.

So open your maps – go out there. And if you are lucky – find someone as mad as you to take with you. A travel shared is a travel treasured.

Remember – the world is a book.Those who do not travel read only one page.

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Fight.

If there’s one thing that’s true in this world – it’s to fight for what you feel. Fight for whats right. Fight for what you believe in. Fight when you know it shouldn’t have to be any other way. Fight when it’s important to you.

Because when you don’t stand up for what matters, then you give away the parts of the universe that should have mattered the most to you – but in your fallen battle it somehow gets washed away.

Don’t settle for mere just enough’s. Just settling isn’t good enough! Fight for what you want.

What you want might not be what others want. It might not even be what the universe wants. But if it matters to you then its worth every single fight.

Because life – this life is yours. Nobody should stop you from touching the stars. Because stars exist – you just have to fight hard enough.

You just need to make it matter to you. And that ultimately should be your purpose.

beleive

x x